Teaching Archives - How to Teach

How to weekend

Posted on August 30, 2023August 31, 2023 by Elizabeth

“You only get one day. Pick one. You don’t get a two-day weekend in your first couple of years”.

Sad man looking at a calendar on Freepik.com

This was the sage, but stark advice given to me by a trusted vice principal when I was in the second half of my PGCE.

Not having a weekend had already been my reality, but I just assumed it was because I was disorganised or slow. I didn’t realise that it was “normal” that I was not able to fit in all my obligations as well as leisure time in a weekend.

You have to accept that your social life and hobbies will have to take a deep cut for a couple of years. Radical acceptance is required from you that will not be able to do everything you did before. You will have to be very clear and specific about what you can and cannot include in your spare time.

Remember that you’re giving yourself the best chance at being a fantastic teacher – your career is worth the short-term sacrifice.

Plan the weekend

The weekend starts on Friday night. I like to decompress with colleagues on Friday nights. I’ve been lucky enough to work in schools in which the teaching staff are very sociable. I like to go out and share roses, thorns and buds and “let go” of the week that has just been.

This will not necessarily also be right for you. Some teachers want to get as far away as possible, as quickly as possible from all things school on a Friday night. They do not want to spend their time talking shop after a grueling week at work.

It can be tempting to get into your pyjamas and just kick back with a nice drink and some mindless television. You have earned a break and deserve to relax. If, however, this attitude spills into Saturday and Sunday you might be inadvertently building yourself up for a very stressful week ahead.

A woman relaxing at home on Freepik.com

TGIF night – first night of the weekend

The secret is to be intentional. I usually do my laundry on Friday night. I’ll get home and put on a wash load. This is then done and ready on Saturday morning so all I need to do is take it out to dry, ready to iron on Sunday.

You might find that washing up, hoovering or cleaning the bathroom are great decompression tasks that you can complete as you wind down for bed. You will never regret doing these tasks the next morning when you wake up to a clean house.

Weekends are for lie-ins

I’m sorry but no, they are not. It’s better for your overall sleep hygiene if you if you wake up at the same time at the weekend as you do on Monday to Friday.

Use that time as your precious protected time. Maybe take a walk in nature, go to the gym, get started on housework, go food shopping, do food prep for the following week or journal.

Use that time to actively support your mental or physical wellbeing. Cleaning and organising your living space serves both of those very well.

Schedule the weekend

I cheat and spread my leisure time across both Saturday and Sunday. This is what a typical weekend looks like for me.

Friday night – laundry

Saturday

5am – 7am – laundry, washing up, hoover flat

7am – 12pm – breakfast, clean kitchen, lesson planning

12pm – 5pm – clean bathroom, lesson planning

5pm – leisure time

Sunday

5am – 7am – iron work clothes, sort work food and bag

7am – 12pm – change bedding, bedding laundry, lesson planning

12pm – leisure time

I make sure that I have the essentials covered so that I can sanely navigate the following week with as much order and as little chaos as possible.

I use my breaks from planning to get quick tasks done like cleaning the bathroom or changing my bedding. All of these are necessary as well as productive so if I’m stuck on a piece of work or can’t face a new task, I’m not “wasting time” by cleaning the cooker instead.

Schedule the weekend fun

To make sure that I don’t become a house bound at the weekend I actively make plans for my weekend evenings.

It might be tempting to just wait for the weekend and play it by ear. I guarantee though, that if you don’t have to get ready and go somewhere to meet someone, you won’t. It’s important that you know during the day that you have a time limit on how long you have to get everything done. This will give you the impetus to get it done quickly so you can get cracking with your lovely fun evening.

I deliberately schedule working time on Sunday too. That’s because if I don’t get everything done on Saturday I still have time planned in to work on Sunday. This makes it easier for me to down tools on Saturday and allow myself my leisure time.

What if I schedule my weekend wrong?

There is no right way or wrong way to weekend, only your way. It may take some time to figure out what type of schedule works best for you.

Your goal should be to eliminate the “Sunday Scaries”. You never want to be asking yourself “How it is Sunday night already?” . That growing panic as you realise there isn’t enough time now to get everything you wanted to do done now is not an experience you need to have.

Remember that it won’t be like this forever. By being intentional with your time you are being kind to your present and future self. Making sure that you are ready for the week ahead is the best way to start the week. You will get a feeling of calm and order as you tick all of the tasks off your list. This will be exuded into your daily interactions with staff and students alike in the week ahead.

Once you have established a routine that suits how you weekend, you will then have the freedom to be more flexible going forward.

how to teach

How to speak to parents

Posted on May 2, 2023May 2, 2023 by Elizabeth

“Speak to their parents on a Friday night. They will have the time to listen properly and ask questions. The child will then have to hear about it from their parents for the whole weekend. I guarantee they won’t do it again”.

Speak on a phone on Freepik.com

That was the sage advice given to me by an incredible vice principal at my second school. It put into perspective the potentially powerful impact of calls home to parents.

Before this happened I had viewed calls home as a necessary evil. A task that had to be made, on occasion, in line with the school policy. I didn’t believe that parents cared what I had to say. I didn’t believe that they would follow through and discuss the incidents with their children.

People on speaking on the phone at Freepik.com

When do I speak to parents?

As above, ideally on a Friday afternoon, but if the call is time sensitive as soon as possible on the same day after school.

The end of the day is the best time because your teaching day is over, you are not likely to be distracted by pupils or other teachers. You also don’t have the time constraints of having to be somewhere or do something like you would during the school day. You can therefore be more present and engaged while on the call.

Where do I speak to parents?

Make sure you find a private room with a door that closes and is quiet / sound proof. You want to be able to hear and be heard clearly as you may have to impart sensitive information. It can be awkward to the point of being unprofessional if there are frequent requests to repeat / spell / clarify something. Use the school landline phone so they can see before they pick up that it is a call from the school. If that is not possible use your mobile phone but block your number first (please double check this).

What do I say to parents?

They key here is to keep it short and sweet.

Ask if they are the parent / carer for the child using their title and surname and wish them a good afternoon / evening.

Introduce yourself using your title and surname and the subject you teach the child. State the lesson (day and time) you are ringing about and apologise for the fact that the call is negative. Then state the specific thing that they child did to get the sanction.

I have a habit of making a short story long so I “script” my calls in advance to ensure that I keep the conversation contained.

Remember that the parent is more likely to listen and be supportive of the call if your focus is the impact on their ability to thrive academically rather than just their behaviour being unacceptable.

How do I say it to parents?

When relaying the specific thing that the child did wrong, centre it around how this affects their learning. Don’t say “Johnny didn’t do his homework so he has to be more organised”. Instead say “Johnny didn’t do his homework so he was not able to take part in the first half of today’s lesson.

Child had to be removed due to using disrespectful language? The real issue is that they were out of the room during a pivotal discussion that will mean that next lesson they will not understand the test.

Child was throwing stationery across the room? The real issue is that when you asked them to explain a concept that the class was discussing they had no idea what to say.

And so on and so forth.

Make sure that you are factual and do not offer opinions. For example, “he was chatting to his neighbour about last night’s football match and not the properties of metals” not “he was chatting to his neighbour about last night’s football match and he doesn’t like to work in science lessons”. You get the gist.

You can then tell them the consequences that have been issued – what are they (30 mins) and when will they be implemented (tomorrow after school).

Ask them if they have any questions and then thank them for their time and their support.

You will feel like a talking robot the first few times you call home. It is important to have your own version of a script so you do not veer off and get drawn into long ponderous circular discussions or negotiations.

Phew. All done?

Not yet. Make sure that you log the call immediately. I am a scatter brain and I’m very good at forgetting. In some schools all communications have to be logged. I would recommend that even if it is not mandated you also do this in your early years of teaching. I can guarantee that you will forget what you did / didn’t say to a parent – this way you don’t have to rely on your memory.

Log the call on the school MIS reporting system. A lot of what you need will be automated on on drop down menu. Log the day, time, parent name, reason for the call, outcome of the call and any next steps, for example, the child will ensure they bring a calculator to all lessons.

Also make sure that any administration is done immediately. For example, an email to the head of department to inform them that the parent would like a call back from them.

Anything else?

I know that it’s extremely unlikely but you should always behave like the call is being recorded for your mentor to review.

This is a great way of ensuring that you keep it short, specific and professional.

You are relaying information regarding the child’s conduct not seeking their opinion or permission about the sanction issued.

In the very rare instance that the call can become contentious, and the parent is not supportive, your best bet is to end the call and seek the support of a more senior teacher.

And if they don’t pick up?

Check your school’s policy but it should be okay to leave a succinct voicemail. End it by repeating who you are, what you teach their child and that they can ring the school if they would like to have a call back.

You could also send them an email outlining the reason and the sanction. Also tell them that you would be happy to ring them to explain in more detail.

Speaking positively on Freepik.com

Great. All done!

Not quite. Calls home should also be about positive things.

Try to remember to follow up the negative call with a positive call home a couple of weeks later. Even if the improvement you are witnessing is miniscule the parent will be very happy to hear it.

This shows the parents that you notice all things – positive, negative and indifferent. You’re not just the voice of doom relishing in spreading bad news. You are also able to see and celebrate in their child’s successes. This is guaranteed to be a well-received call when you speak to parents.

how to teach

How to dress

Posted on January 10, 2023April 13, 2023 by Elizabeth

Her outfit was so inappropriate she was not allowed to go past the receptionists desk. She was told it was not an acceptable way to dress when teaching teenage boys.

That was the horror story we were regaled with about a former student teacher on their first day at her first school. Her skirt and top were so inappropriate that she was sent home.

We were all trainee teachers and it was during one of our sessions devoted to professionalism, specifically, how to dress appropriately. The tutor was then bombarded with various questions around what was and was not an acceptable skirt length, heel height and tattoo cover up. He stopped the discussion and told us all one rule that I still observe to this day – “Wear what you would wear if you worked as a cashier in a bank”.

Smartly dressed bank employees on Freepik.com

But I don’t work for a corporation!!

True. But then you’re missing the point. Remember why you are there and what you represent. How you show up to work is one of the ways in which you signal your commitment to your role and attitude to your responsibilities.

You are a professional tasked with delivering lessons to pupils in a calm, organised and efficient way. If your clothing is untidy and unkempt it’s much harder for those around you to take you seriously.

The pupils get told how to dress, I don’t!!

True again. But also, kind of not true. Your school will have a staff clothing policy. They will be guidelines about what you should or should not wear. This can also include policies on jewelry and hair colour. Different schools will enforce this policy in different ways. You will never get asked for a meeting if your dress sense errs on the smarter side. You might however if you demonstrate daily that your iron is broken.

So how do I dress then?

Have a work uniform. This is admittedly easier for men as they usually have a few suits and rotate them. Women have more freedom to decide what they consider to be smart. This is what my uniform generally consists of:

5 sets of bottoms (so you have one for every day)
10 tops (so you have a back up option everyday)
1 blazer (a dark colour that goes with and smartens up everything)
2 pairs of low heeled dark shoes that need shoe polish (you are on your feet all day; if one pair gets ruined you have a backup pair already)

I keep the colours neutral eg black, navy, grey, cream, white so that mixing and matching between outfits is easy to do. Make sure that you also have a couple of cardigans or jumpers too so that if it’s cold, you don’t have to put on your coat in the classroom.

When deciding on your items think about clothing that is relatively cheap (you will definitely get pen on it at some point). It should also be machine washable (any silk and cashmere should come off the list). Make sure that you can stand or sit in comfortably in all of your clothes for at least two hours at a time. Check that all your clothes reveal an amount of skin that you deem appropriate no matter how you are walking, standing or sitting.

Yes, but how can I express my individuality?

Looking professional rather than cute is the objective. The list above might seem excessively rigid but you express your personality by being uniquely you. Not through the things you wear. You aren’t there to dazzle them with your dress sense but with your teaching skills.

Your mentor / head of department / assistant principal etcetera will be keeping a keen eye on all the early career teachers. Your subject knowledge and behaviour management will be top of their list to watch out for. Professionalism (including things like time keeping, engagement with pupils, attire) is a broad metric that they can assess every time they interact with you. Don’t give them a new problem to deal with. Make it your intention to make their assessment of you as favourable as possible at all times.

Show them that you know how to dress.

Teaching

How to flex

Posted on December 31, 2022January 2, 2023 by Elizabeth

Never hesitate to “big up your bad self”! Tongue-in-cheek flexing is a great way to bring a light-hearted element to your lessons. It is a brief repose from the seriousness of teaching and learning.

Teachers and students laughing on Freepik.com

Excellence is an attitude

As a teacher you will become intimate with all aspects of your personality. Any air and graces will be chased away promptly as you dig deep into being your authentic and unfiltered self.

You will have to come to terms with your actual subject knowledge, your pedagogical skills, your capacity for patience and your sense of humour.

Excellence in all areas should always be your goal. Excellence, however, like flexing is also an attitude.

When I was in primary school, in Year 6 I drew a drawing of a Viking boat. My teacher complimented me on the technique I used to emphasise the wood. He said it was excellent. Ever since then I have considered myself an excellent artist. Drawing is my flex. Any (most) drawings that I produce that are below par I consider as me just having a bad day. My confidence in my artistic abilities will not be shaken.

Your haters are your motivators

I take that same energy to all of my lessons. As I science teacher I often have to draw the Earth, cells, plants, animals, transportation and so on in order to illustrate a point.

I am often met with howls of protest and looks of confusion. I am, however, impervious to any negative feedback, and I always insist that what I have drawn is in very good (if not excellent). If they disagree, then that is unfortunate.

Find your flex

You will also have an aspect of your delivery for example, a style of writing, that they will be merciless when offering critique. Find it and offer it up to be mocked.

Be bold. Be brave and don’t budge.

This is a great way to let them “in on the joke” with you. A little bit of levity that it appropriately pitched but not so raucous as to actively interrupt the flow of your lesson.

Big up your bad self

Finding a small piece of you that the students can collectively drag you on is a nice way of letting them know that you are comfortable with being more “human”.

Be really bad at something – drawing, mathematics, pronunciation – give them something to mock you about. This is a great way to introduce some levity if needed.

It is not essential that you find your “shtick” and laboriously work it into the lesson like a comedy routine.

I guarantee that the pupils will find many reasons to laugh at you. Openly or otherwise.

Any disrespect does, of course, have to be handled according to your school’s behaviour policy but find the joke that you’re happy to turn on it’s head and use it as an opportunity to be more relatable.

Sprinkle the flex

Being the butt of the joke does not mean being the class clown. It is important to strike a very fine balance so always keep it short and sweet. Never allow it to deviate from the core of your lesson.

Teaching

How to be yourself

Posted on December 30, 2022December 30, 2022 by Elizabeth

How to maintain your authenticity and sanity in the classroom.

There are many different types of teachers. This article states 14 different types. As you continue your teaching career you need to consider what type of teacher you are. You need to consider what kind of personality style you want to adopt.

Adopt a personality style?

But I want to always be my authentic self with the children!!!

You will be. Kind of.

It is a little naïve to think that your personality only has one mode and that you are exactly the same all of the time to everyone equally.

Think of how you interact with your grandparents at Sunday lunch versus how you interact with your best friends at Saturday night drinks. Are you being authentic with them? Yes. Are you speaking and behaving in the exact same way with both of them? I hope not.

The greatest showman

The same applies in school. Think of your role in the classroom as a performer. Before you arrive, you have planned the seating, the lesson, the classwork, and the homework. If you are a very new teacher, you will also have practiced teaching the lesson.

This all needs to be delivered in a certain amount of time. All while keeping an eye out that your instructions are being followed, off task behaviour is in check and everyone is clear about what to do next. You are executing instructions, explanations, demonstrations, questions, and corrections in a pre-arranged format. As well as being clear on what you are going to teach it follows that you should also plan how to teach it.

You will naturally gravitate to being one (or a combination) of the 14 teaching styles above. Consider in advance the type of relationship dynamic you want to strike between you and your pupils. You will be better informed about what type of “vibe” you want to promote in your classroom.

For example, the Enthusiastic Teacher may encourage lots of discussions of topics between students before they tackle independent work. The Traditional Teacher, however, will most likely restrict class discussions because of the greater opportunity it allows for off task chatter between pupils.

Persona non-grata?

When you are connecting with the class it is through this assumed version of your normal self. You are likely to be more exaggerated in your facial expressions, more expressive with your hand and body movements, more modulated with the tone and volume of your voice.

Perfection will not be achieved, but you can improve every lesson by being intentional about your persona. You can only be intentional however by planning in advance.

Shake it off?

Adopting a persona maintains your sanity because you’re only giving part of yourself – a curated (and yes, contrived) version. This way you are protecting the rest of “you” so when the inevitable verbal assaults of teenage rudeness, backchat and disdain come, they aren’t attacking you but your persona.

Consequences should be issued in line with your school policy when this happens, but don’t take it personally. You are just another teacher to them – they cannot be aiming anything at you because they don’t know you.

In my experience the teachers that suffer the most from being disrespected always state that they are shocked because the pupils were their friends and had got to know them.

They had adopted the Cool Teacher or Teacher Buddy persona and considered that they were regarded in a different way to the other teachers. By sharing details of their personal lives and connecting with the students outside of lessons they assumed that they would get a pass and therefore be immune to any bad behaviour from the little monsters.

Sharing your private life with pupils has to be very carefully managed or it can be detrimental to both you and the pupils.

Remember that you should, of course, be friendly. But they are never your friend. It doesn’t matter if they like you/ hate you/ tolerate you. You are there to teach them. Your job is to assume your best teacher persona in order that you can give them the best teaching experience possible. Who YOU are is irrelevant.

how to teach

How to indoctrinate children

Posted on December 29, 2022January 3, 2023 by Elizabeth

Fill their minds with a liberal lefty woke agenda and turn them against democracy and capitalism!

I mean, you can try. Good luck with that.

Brainwashing?

There is a narrative among some politicians and media outlets that some (all?) teachers have a “woke liberal agenda”. Teachers insidiously try to infiltrate the pure and innocent minds of the students with the aim of corrupting them and making them become leftist shills.

This article from the Times Education Supplement Magazine – Are we indoctrinating our pupils? – is a tongue in cheek summary of just how ridiculous that premise is.

If you are so inclined, you can try to brainwash the little vessels, but you definitely will not succeed.

Contrary for contrary’s sake

My inability to even get a foothold in my mission to influence minds has been demonstrated many times.

One perfectly illustrative example of this was when I was teaching a Year 8 (age 12 to 13) class. The topic was viscosity (how thick and gloopy liquids are). I wanted to make sure that they knew what it was.

I asked the whole class if they had ever seen maple syrup being poured and three students had not. I then asked if they had ever seen honey being poured and two of the three students said no. Suspecting mischief I asked them both if they had ever seen vegetable oil being poured. They both said no.

They could tell that I needed a consensus on the class’s knowledge of a substances viscosity. It suited them to be contrary little monsters.

Gaslighting and psychological manipulation on Freepik.com

Gaslighting for gaslighting’s sake

They will sometimes even tell you an outright lie. It can become a sport for them to gaslight you.

I was teaching the concept of friction to a different class. I needed them to confirm that they had walked on various surfaces. We needed discuss how slippery they were in comparison to each other. The surfaces were a concrete pavement, a linoleum floor, a wooden floor and a carpeted floor. Three boys claimed to have never walked on a carpeted floor.

Rather than scold or sanction them, I informed the class that future discussions required that the pupils had knowledge of shared experiences. I told the class that only the pupils that knew what we were referencing could speak or contribute. The mischief makers soon got back on board.

Indoctrination for dummies

Indoctrinating a child takes more than the occasional negative reference to Brexit or joke about the prime ministerial revolving door. The people that believe brainwashing by teachers is possible (and easy) have not spent any time of substance engaging with secondary school pupils.

It is difficult enough for teachers to find the time to teach the core National Curriculum comprehensively, let alone shoe horning in discussions of The Communist Manifesto in lesson time.

No harm in trying?

If you do try to indoctrinate children with your agenda (left, right, or whatever) – the pupils will see through you.

Some will gleefully parrot back whatever you say. They will be grateful to have found a way in which you can be easily manipulated – and diverted from teaching a lesson. Some will grudgingly agree with you hoping that if they concur you will hurry up and shut up about whatever it is. The rest will sense your passion for your propaganda and actively and aggressively disagree with you just to watch you get more and more angry.

You will have only succeeded in losing their respect. They will see that you are treating them as intellectual equals and / or you need them to validate your opinions. From that point on they will then treat you with the lack of respect that you will have now earned. They will no longer regard you as a teacher and leader but a peer who has been put in their place – beneath them.

You will spend every future lesson managing disrespectful behaviour and teaching nothing.

This has been your guide on how to indoctrinate children. Good luck with that.

Teaching

How to be private

Posted on December 28, 2022December 31, 2022 by Elizabeth

“You don’t look that old. How old are you?” I have been asked different versions of this question many times. Just one example of the invasion of my private life.

My answer is always the same. “Thank you for asking me but I don’t discuss my private life at school”.

Child broadcasting your private life on Freepik.com

Just tell them. They are just trying to get to know you.

Not really. Some pupils really do care about you and do want to get to know you. Most pupils are just being curious. Some pupils want to have the bragging rights of having found out from you directly, which affords them the ability to flex when they share the information with their peers.

Regardless of the intent the answer should always be the same.

Those that really care may view you as their friend so it’s natural that they would ask their friend personal questions. You must always remember though that you are not and will never be their friend. You should of course be friendly and caring but this does not mean sharing personal information.

Children that need a teacher as a friend are probably struggling with not having peers as friends or see you as a trusted adult maybe because they do not have that at home. You will have had safeguarding training regarding what to look out for and how to report it should you have any concerns – it is always better to err on the side of caution, if you think it might need to be reported, definitely report it.

They just want to know your age. Why does that have to be so private?

There will always be a follow up question. They will keep going until you tap out. Part of being professional is maintain the distance between yourself and the pupils. They should not feel like they have the right to know anything at all about you. It is possible to have a great relationship with pupils without sharing your place of birth, star sign and retirement plans.

Harsh? Maybe.

Seriously though. What are they going to do with any information you share about your trip to the gym, favourite films, number of cats? Your intention should be to forge strong bonds of mutual respect so they “know” you outside of the classroom. They are children and you are an adult who does grown up stuff – don’t share grown up stuff with children.

Let’s get back to basics and remind ourselves that you’re a professional with a responsibility of care. You are there to educate them and teach them how to be responsible members of society. You can be friendly but don’t share your private life. Remember, they are not your friends.

But my private life is my life, nothing to do with school

Yes. But definitely no. I actively choose to always work in schools nowhere near where I live. Luckily that is easy to do living and working in London. I don’t want to come across pupils in the street/ supermarket/ park while I’m enjoy some downtime. It then becomes a game of “will we pretend we haven’t seen each other” or “will we have an awkward two minute non-conversation” (don’t worry they will be more mortified than you).

Some teachers actively live near the school they work in and they love to see the pupils and their parents around and about. That’s great for them. They are less protective of their privacy and don’t see any inevitable questions about their private life as intrusive.

The problem is that once you open that Pandora’s box then it can never be shut again. Once they have one piece of information, they will feel entitled to know more. This is even harder to counter if they themselves have shared personal information with you. It is up to you to decide on your boundaries in advance and then make sure they are not crossed.

Social media sites where your private life is display on Freepik.com

What about my socials?

Especially your socials. Your school will get you to sign on to a bunch of policies at the start of the year. Most schools are now explicit about what is permitted regarding communication with pupils and parents outside school that is not via the schools email / Teams / SharePoint (or equivalent).

Some good advice I got from my first school was to hide away all your social media pages, for example, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, Snapchat – make your profile pictures unrecognisable, remove your surname from your profile, and enable all the privacy controls so any new friend requests can be vetted to ensure that they are people you know. Remember that mum and dad might be curious cats with different surnames to the pupils.

I have had pupils in two different schools tell me that their parents had found me on Instagram (luckily, it’s an old one from six years ago with only two boring posts but I’ve forgotten the password). Protect your privacy. Make sure that your private life remains that way.

Teacher telling students to stop on Freepik.com

So am I supposed to shout them down when they ask me anything?

No, that would not be friendly. Tell them that you’d be happy to discuss it at the end of the lesson. This stops you from batting off their questions during valuable teaching time. Their queries will become louder and more insistent – especially if they can see that you are not comfortable with the questions.

Some of the queries will be innocent, other’s will be downright rude and inappropriate, those need to be sanctioned in line with your school’s policy on behaviour.

They will most likely not come to see you at the end of the lesson to have their personal questions answered. If they do, then thank them for being interested but tell them that you do not discuss your private life at school. Any follow up questions from them can have the same answer. If they become belligerent and rude then of course follow the policy on behaviour.

Remember that it is up to you to decide if you are comfortable sharing your age / where you live / if you are married etcetera etcetera, they are not entitled to know.

So I can’t say anything then?

I didn’t say that. Remember to be friendly. On a tour of the school with a new cohort once I noticed that one of the girls was humming Dynamite by BTS she was blown away that I knew it and after that I was always asking her about what music she was listening to.

In a line up for assembly once I noticed a boy had a pencil case of my favourite football team. Every time I saw him after that I got him to give me an update on how we were doing.

You get the gist.

When you are walking around the school make it a point to say hi to every student you walk past. Make sure you say their name too, they love to be acknowledged. If you are approached by a pupil and they clearly want to talk to you but seem shy, you will get a response from one of these questions:

How is you day going?
What lesson do you have next?
Are you joining any school clubs this year?

The questions are open ended enough to afford you a follow up question regardless of what they reply. They are also closed enough to allow them to give you a one-word answer. You can also then tell them your answers to these questions, and they will feel like you are connecting with them.

What if I let something slip?

Don’t beat yourself up. It is a tricky balance to find. There are so many things that need to be negotiated and considered on a daily basis you’re allowed to give yourself a break. Protect your privacy fiercely. Don’t let yourself find out the hard way why you must always be friendly but can never be friends.